You know, I'm thinking of many two word combinations that can be made into handy compound words to describe your new pen pal.

But the pair that seems most appropriate would be: Douche and Bag

There are others to be sure, but they most involve insulting every guy named Richard on the planet.

Sorry, but I have to get back to studying the concept of evaluative regression through sphincter muscle constructs via the hierarchical categorization of combustible methane expulsions from cretins like this in academia.

However, I do feel better now for some silly reason.